never expected: James Adamson

my first prayer was kind of on a lark
yet it opened my life like an army of angels
I pray to the east as my mom lay in the hospital
I had no idea who I was
until I knew who I was to God
there was an army of evil trying to say it was too late
that my mistakes defined me
yet standing up for myself was my chance to prevent mistakes from leading the way
to believe in myself was to defend many to save sinners
all have contempt for me
but it was deception
it had to be because my mistakes were ignorant
I saw the moment I was alone was the moment I was with God
I interacted instead of extending myself
love instead of judgement
I even saw the woman I love
and fought to be in my own family
I look for comfort in my knowledge
yet I have been in pain some of the time
my load has been eased and my yolk lightened
as I fight power of hateful thoughts
either we fight for each other or we use ideas to vanquish others
while I truly talk more and more for the first time.